J is for Jordan, JoJo, Josephina, Joe, Jorgini...

my poor baby girl isn't feeling well this week...so today J is for Jordan...and all the other J names i call her.

and to think that you were almost Samantha Rae...and this post would never have existed.

i KNOOOOOW you're not faking when you turn down chocolate chip pumpkin muffins. feel better love.

here's an acrostic just for you :)

jordan noel lee

**************

J is for JOYFUL

O is for ON TOP OF THE WORLD

R is for RADIANT

D is for DAUGHTER

A is for ATHLETIC

N is for NUTTY

N is for NATURAL

O is for ORIGINAL

E is for ENCHANTING

L is for LOYAL

L is for LOVED

E is for EXCEPTIONAL

E is for ELEGANT

you are loved.

xoxo.

I is also for I CRACK MYSELF UP :)

sooooooo, sweet sweet blog post regarding carson and how much he respects & loves his dad. love, love. kiss, kiss. now, let's laugh, shall we? :)


i decided that since we couldn't BE there with bobby for his ocean-side birthday dinner with nanny, aunt melba and aunt t tonight that we should have our OWN birthday celebration here.

and you CAN'T have a birthday celebration without PRESENTS to open, right?


earlier in the day, i booked bobby's ticket to fly back and see us the end of march. i didn't tell the kids...and earlier in the WEEK, i met my sister at borders and happened to notice that all the calendars were $1.00 each.


so i ran up to the bookstore today...and picked out a calendar for each of the kids...i opened them up and marked each day from now til dad arrives...43 days and counting down as of today.


i wrapped up the calendars & let them all open a gift...and then they had to look through to figure out the surprise. clone wars for hud, tron for carson, dogs for jo & airplanes for austin...

carson noticed first with a huge YES!!!!!!!!

followed by tears. because it's not soon enough. :( :( :( :( :(

but hey, i promised you a giggle...so wipe that tear from your eye and check out the calendar for me.

hee hee hee.

43 more days til MY cowboy is back in TEXAS. :)


love you dear. really, i do. LOL.


and JUST SO YOU DON'T WORRY, carson is okay. birthday brownies work wonders for a sad heart.

p.s. here's a birthday picture that hudson drew you after school today. it's you two running toward each other. he didn't know yet that you were coming home :)


looooooove you. xoxo.

I is for IF MY DAD WAS PRESIDENT...

carson came home from school the other day, so excited about something he had done in class. he wrote in his journal about who he thought should be president. and he picked his dad. and the reasons he shared made me smile (and tear up). since the journal doesn't come home til the end of the school year (THAT is going to be one interesting read LOL), i asked the teacher for a copy.
and in case you can't read the picture, here's what it says:
Do you know what the world needs? My dad. He's responsible, helpful and always cares about our family. Right now he is in Virginia and my dad had to start a job early.

Can you imagine what it would be like to have my dad saying: Freedom will always last! Oh and have Tony Romo as vice president! Me and my dad saying my dad should be president!

My dad will be just like George W. Bush! Oh my dad can provide for the world, and he could be doing the most hardest thing on earth but he is not a quitter! He will never stop! Like when he lost his job and he never stopped looking for a job.

And that is why he should be president.

happy birthday bobby lee. your kids (and your wife) think you're pretty awesome. we are all so proud of you. thank you for being a great provider, for never quitting and for always caring about your family. out of the mouth of babes...
xoxo.

H is for HE LOVES ME..

tonight it's valentine's day. the boys are in bed, the big kids are at youth group and i turned on the tv to see if i could find something to watch...

the bachelor is on. on valentine's day? REALLY?

a parade of girls...each one trying to out do the next. each trying to put her best foot (well, her best SOMETHIN' ...lol...) forward...trying to win over the handsome 'prince.'

they stand with trepidation, waiting to find out if they are 'good enough' to make the cut. will he keep them around? or will he decide that he's moving on, that he's found someone else that thrills him more.

these girls, bless their hearts, seem so pathetic. so desperate to impress this dude. so hoping to make him fall in love with them.

and while i'd like to make fun of them, i can't.

i'd say most of my life i've been playing this game...only not with the hottie du jour...but rather with the God of this universe. i've dolled myself up...made myself as 'good' as i can be...i've done everything i can to impress him...to try and improve my 'credentials,' my 'ranking.'

and then i've hoped...and hoped...that i'd be good enough...that i'd be worthy of a rose...that he'd keep me around another day, another month, another year.

and it's really kind of sad...that it's taken me THIS LONG to start to wrap my brain around the fact that HE LOVES ME. i don't have to DO anything. i don't have to WONDER if i'm going to get a rose...he's already got one with my name on it.

there is no dress ugly enough...no deformity grotesque enough...to turn him away from me.

he loves me. HE REALLY LOVES ME.

so tonight, i remind myself that i need to refrain from playing the childhood game of HE LOVES ME, HE LOVES ME NOT and choose to believe that HE LOVES ME.

psalm 52:8,9 -- i trust in God's unfailing love for ever and ever. i will praise you for what you have done. in YOUR NAME i will hope, for your name is good.

F is for FUTURE-WIFE

in the spring of 2007, we had just moved into our rental house in texas.
someone knocked on the door...we didn't even KNOW anyone yet...who could it be?

the most adorable little girl was standing on my door step...a sprinkle of freckles across her nose...sparkling blue eyes...





in lightning fast speed, she said her name was rachel, she lived down the street, and she noticed that i had a little girl about her age and she wanted to meet her. and with that one super fast sentence, we welcomed rachel into our lives forever.

through the years, we've sort of decided that we love her too much to let her go. and the girls came up with a plan...if RACHEL married AUSTIN, then the girls would always get to celebrate the holidays together. THEY'D BE SISTERS!

and somewhere along the way, austin decided that he was okay with this :)

so now, rachel calls austin FUTURE-HUSBAND. and he ANSWERS. hee hee. yes, she DOES have a boyfriend already...but we're not worried about that...it's temporary, right? we already 'claimed' her years ago :)


rachel and austin have planned out their honeymoon. they are going to PARIS, JAMAICA & OHIO. this makes me LOL for REAL. they are not in agreement on how they are actually GETTING to paris though.

austin says there's no way he's flying across the ocean in a "tin-can" (yes, this coming from the one who has professed his desire to be a PILOT??????). he thinks they should take a boat. rachel says, 'HAVE YOU SEEN TITANIC??????? NO WAY.'

so we have a few details to work out...but i'm not worried.
rachel, it has been an absolute JOY to have you in our lives. we've watched you grow from little girl to gorgeous young lady... YOU ARE AN ABSOLUTE RAY OF SUNSHINE AND WE LOVE YOU DEARLY.

please tell your parents that if you turn up missing come june, that you're safe...your daddy should be able to arrange frequent flights from virginia to houston for you to visit them, right?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GIRL. you're going to be one fabulous daughter-in-law.
love,

your FUTURE-MOM-IN-LAW :)

xoxo

E is for EMOTION...lots of it...

somewhere along the way, i think i had joined jordan's camp...

if you haven't HEARD of where jordan's been (mentally) camping, it's a place called DENIAL and it's filled with all sorts of things like pet tigers, and pink jeeps with zebra interior...and purple flying unicorns that transport you back and forth to other states...and also includes plans to drop out of highschool in order to sell sno-cones on the beach...i've seen her in a bikini...while i'm CERTAIN she'd do quite well for herself, her father and i really AREN'T OKAY with that plan (and if i'm being honest, the pet tiger kinda scares me a little...but maybe not as much as the bikini clad sno-cone salesgirl LOL).

in any case, today there was no avoiding it. time to face the reality that this is REALLY happening. this morning bobby headed out. we had a very sweet time last night as a family...all six of us climbed into our lumpy ol' bed and talked...and prayed...and some of us might have cried...

carson prayed that daddy would not have to carry aunt melba to protect her from the slugs (he's not quite got that story down yet LOL). jordan prayed that daddy would text her 24/7. and we all prayed that we would make it through the day.

with two hours to go, i'm going to say my THANK YOU PRAYER in advance and call it a day. 'daddy' has gotten about three hours outside of atlanta and is well on his way. tomorrow we're hoping that the weather stays clear for him as he continues on.

the kids each made him a card to tuck in his bag...you can see which one is feeling dad's departure the most at this point. and while i get choked up for her, i also am so so so so so very grateful that she has this kind of relationship with her dad. there is nothing but love between the two of them. she doesn't for a second doubt him...his love for her...his willingness to move heaven and earth to be there for her however he can be...and i could NOT be more grateful for that. oh, if only we could each feel that bond with our heavenly father...if we could just put aside our earthly assumptions...our own personal history...and just ENJOY the love of our father...and TRUST that he really DOES adore us for who we are...

but enough of that...on to artwork and sentiment...

here is carson's card:

and hudson's...love that he included maya...daddy may pretend not to like her but he actually loves her...and he KNOWS it...
and austin's :(

and jordan's...sigh...

and lastly, a play-doh masterpiece, also created by jordan...

lunches are packed, homework is signed, kids are all in bed and i am calling it a day.

what kind of day?

no other word for it...EMOTIONAL.

D is for DESTINY...

do you ever look back at your life and realize that a single decision has FOREVER altered your DESTINY?

as i reflect on my own life, there are some MAJOR defining moments that have absolutely changed the course i was on (thank GOD).

some things are of our own choosing. some, not so much. along this journey, there are times where we just DON'T have any control over our destiny. that can be an unsettling feeling.

but i believe (i just HAVE to believe) that ultimately, if our hearts long for God to use us...if we really want to do what HE wants us to do...then he'll get us where we need to be...one way or another.

and so, today, i think about AUSTIN'S DESTINY.

today is his SEVENTEENTH birthday. and for the entire time we've lived in texas, this child has been obsessed with airplanes...he has served in the Air Force Junior ROTC and was completely focused on becoming a pilot.


of course, this goal requires LOTS of cash...something we don't have. and so for the last year, he has seriously been contemplating joining the military so that his education would be paid for. we just didn't see another way of him reaching this goal.


meanwhile, the OTHER side of austin is his amazing artistic ability. he has SUCH a gift...and it's been evident since he was a toddler. his attention to detail when it comes to art is just mind boggling. and we've always wondered if he would go down that road. he once wrote a letter to Steven Spielberg...i saved it and stumbled upon it not too long ago. i could totally see him going into some kind of production.

this move changes EVERYTHING for him. not only did he discover on his flights to and from virginia recently that he turns green when he flies (not exactly a quality the air force is probably looking for, huh? LOL), but we also now have the opportunity for him to attend a private college on-site for 75% off because his dad will be an employee. this is HUUUUUGE. and they have some incredible programs that would be right up his alley.

MAJOR, LIFE ALTERING, DESTINY CHANGING move approaching for austin. i'll say it one more time: this changes EVERYTHING.

and i'm going to choose to trust that as we move forward, this gets him one step closer to whatever it is that he was born to do.

i love you austin lee. happy 17th birthday. you are such a gift to me.

xoxo.