ugh...this is a hard one...

i've held off typing all day...because part of me just doesn't want to have to really THINK that deeply on what i'm about to share...

but in the spirit of thanksgiving, i'm going to CHOOSE to be thankful for CHANGE.

UGH. i mean, i DO like change. i DO. but i like to PICK my change. lol. is that SO WRONG? :)

one year ago today, life changed. BAM. that fast.

it had been a ROUGH journey after bobby was laid off from the church he was working for. we walked through SO VERY MUCH. for awhile, i wasn't sure i was ever going to get him 'back.' i had lost him to this huge weight of anxiety, stress, fear, feelings of extreme failure. not gonna lie: it wasn't pretty.

so when he asked me if there was ANY way that he could go home to visit his family for thanksgiving, i knew we'd have to find a way. he just NEEDED the escape. we booked his ticket and that was that. little could we have guessed what would happen next.

CBN (the company he had worked for TWENTY YEARS in virginia beach) called. they heard he was looking for work and wondered if he'd be interested in a certain position & was there a good time that he could come to town to interview? this was the friday before he left. he told them he was going to be there the following week and they set up the meeting.

after sooooo much waiting...and praying...and hoping...the tears, the fears...i didn't expect that we would have an answer quickly...i mean, everything for us had been dragged out. i swear, i have aged SOOOO much in the last year it's not even funny (i'm certainly not laughing). so when he called me that afternoon and said they WANTED HIM and it was HIS IF HE WANTED IT, it sort of surprised me.

and from that moment on, we've experienced CHANGE on a daily basis.

overall, it's been good. to see my husband back in his element, working with guys he's known since grade school...with his sense of humor back in place, with hope and joy back in his heart...it makes it all worth it.

it hasn't killed my children. lol. each of them has had things they've had to walk through as a result of this change. but they are doing well.

i KNOW that this move was intended for us...that we are where we are supposed to be. i do miss my family. my friends. my job. my home. my kitchen. BUT i am thankful that i have such sweet memories to treasure.

and so, overall i AM thankful for change. i know that it stretches us. it tests us. and it has the capacity to pull us apart or bring us together. we have chosen to allow it to do the latter. and i hope it stays that way.

i realize that there is NO WAY to know what tomorrow holds. a year from now i could be writing about november 24, 2011 and how THAT was the day that ushered in ANOTHER new season.

i sort of hope not though. i'd kind of be okay with an uneventful year. (God, are you listening?). :)

'do not boast about tomorrow, for you do not know what a day may bring.' proverbs 27:1