Sunday, August 12, 2012

ready or not...

during my high school years, my sisters and i shared a bathroom.  it was a groovy lavender and green bathroom.  hours were spent fixing our hair & applying our make up.  we spent many MORE hours in our bedrooms agonizing over clothing choices.

unfortunately for my dad this meant that he was regularly having to try and get us down the stairs and out the door.  i can STILL remember him yelling up the stairs, 'BUS IS LEAVING.'  and we KNEW we needed to pick up the pace.

now i have my own children and only ONE of them spends hours on her hair and make up.  the boys are definitely easier in the 'getting ready' department.

but that doesn't mean that getting everyone out the door is an easy task.  the most frenzied times are in the mornings...when i've hit the snooze button one too many times...and now we're all running late.  and the bus is coming...ready or not.

i would be lying if i said i've never turned into crazy mom...yelling THE BUS IS COMING!!!!  HURRY UP!!!!!!  just grab your backpack...your shoe...whatever...GO, GO, GOOOOOO!!!!! and pretty much shoving the kids out the door.  it's definitely happened a time or two :)  (or maybe multiply that into the hundreds...).

so a couple  nights ago, the dream that i had was VERY VERY FAMILIAR.  the bus was coming.   the mood was frantic.  i was hollering that the bus was almost here.  and literally pushing the kids out the door.

the weird thing is that the setting wasn't a recent was our 'dollhouse' back in parma heights, ohio.  and it was SO vivid, so REAL.  (look closely and you can see austie & jo jo in the corner on the rocks).

i woke up and my heart was pounding.  and it brought back memories that feel like they were just a few days ago...when in reality it's been almost a decade.

time goes SO fast.

and as i tried to fall back asleep, i realized that i'm sort of in that crazy mom mode again...

tonight is austin's last night at home.  we head up to liberty university tomorrow.  the car is packed.  the classes are scheduled.  his room is awaiting him.  and it's happening, READY OR NOT.

as much as THOSE details are covered, it's the things you CAN'T see that are causing the last minute scurry.

the bus is coming...READY OR NOT.

and we're shoving him out the door.

and it's not without some tears.

surprisingly it's not MY tears.  this shocks me.  i am surprising myself daily by my togetherness (of course, we haven't said goodbye yet LOL).

but AUSTIN is worried about whether he's 'ready' or not.  and quite frankly,  there isn't time for that.  the bus is in view, know what i mean?  we've done the best we can.  we've prepared him best we can.   there have been areas where i've hit the snooze button too many times, you know?  he may be missing a figurative shoe or backpack...he's just going to have to do the best he can with what he's got.

and so on this college-bound-eve, i hope, i PRAY that all that we have gone through has prepared him enough for this time...that he will face the unknown with confidence...with hope...knowing that it's the only way to get to the future he has dreamed of.

the bus is coming...READY OR NOT.  and we'll all be waiting, noses pressed against the glass, for the return of austin...and maybe, just maybe, we'll have some warm cookies and milk waiting.

here's a pic of carson and buddy waiting for the bus to bring austin and sissy home.  there are more of us waiting now...and a different dog...but the excitement and anticipation is the same :)

you've got this AUSTIN LEE.  one day at a time.  with a crew of people cheering you on.  LOVE YOU.